Sexy Labia: Love Your Sexy Labia

mrmarquis

If you want honest opinions, simply provide some photos here. The thing is, there is no "normal". Everyone is different. Look at the excerpts from the book being put together by Cornball. "Messy?" "Ugly?" "Rotting meat?" That is certainly not how anyone but you feels about you.

LabiaLover · Post edited by LabiaLover at 2012-03-09 16:00:51

@ECC22

I'm guessing you're unfamiliar with the phrase "Diamond in the Rough".

In any case. . .I don't think @tempest_driver means time was wasted on you in the literal sense -- I think what he's saying is basically mirroring how we all feel, and that is that you hear and see only what you want.

You could care less about the facts, because you are determined to find that you are "abnormal" and you are "messy looking" down there -- just look at the way you talk about it -- do you listen to yourself??

I hate to say it, but if I was a woman with large labia, I'd be *PISSED* if you lumped me in with yourself and said that I'm "messy looking" down there. I'm a man, and I have that opinion, so I can only imagine how some of the other women might feel (or not, since our ladies like @Kitty77, @Eva, @SugarPlumFaery and others are pretty confident about themselves and I'm sure it'll take more than the ramblings of a woman who is clearly obsessed with, as @tempest_driver put it, "blending into the crowd so that you go unnoticed").

This might hurt your feelings or make you feel bad, but the truth is that the "crowd" you are so desperate to blend into, are women who look JUST like you down there -- some do, some don't, some are in-between.

If course, you will believe what you want, like you typically do no matter the facts being presented, but again like I said to you previously -- just because you don't believe the Moon is in the sky because you can't see it through the light of the powerful Sun doesn't mean it stops existing -- and it damn sure doesn't mean the rest of the world believes what you believe either.

It seems you are in the majority, but believe you are part of a minority within the majority -- go figure. :|

Your last sentence is a bit weird, like most of the things you say, but is a misnomer:

"Is there any way to submit pictures?"

"I have no desire for anyone to tell me it's beautiful."

"I just want an honest opinion of how big I really am."

So which is it??

You want the opinions or you don't want them??

Regardless, if you'd like to submit pics and don't want opinions about your pics,
that's fine.

Here's how you can accomplish that:

1) Send your pics to me (labialover@sexylabia.net) and I'll post them in a thread that is closed, so that no one can comment (since you don't want comments) and I will be the only comment to tell you how big I think they really are. Fair enough??

2) You can post the pics up yourself using this link: https://www.sexylabia.net/post/discussion/

Let me know after you've done it, and I will remove any comments you do get about how beautiful they are, which is inevitable, and close the thread for you so that no opinions can be posted about your pics.

But yeah, I think pics are forthcoming at this point, given how big of a deal you're making it, we may as well see what all the complaining is about. . .

[Deleted User]

I know I look sexy with a womanly figure and lovely parts. I personally do not take offense to your comments, @ecc22. I wish I lived in your town so I could meet you for coffee and give you a big hug. That said, other women come on here needing to find confidence. Do you think your words are helping them? Please do seek help from a mental health professional. Your opinion of yourself is troubling to hear :( I have thought of you in the last few weeks. I have wished good for you, but feared your absence may not just be from this website, but from this world. If you accept nothing else from this community, accept that we want you to find happiness, and to be well. I remember you saying you generally like your body, and are a little barbie-ish. Could it be you have realized that you are not perfect emotionally, but are transferring obsession over internal imperfection to the more concrete physical imperfection? Maybe, as much as you seem to be in agony over your labia, the true imperfection with which you struggle would be much harder to deal with. Human to human, I love you. Please please get help...

Eva

@ECC22 and @LabiaLover

Sticks and stones will break my bones but names will never hurt me. A little nostalgic but it says it all in a nutshell. As Kitty stated, I take no offense to her comments, she's simply at a different stage than I.

ECC22

I'm sorry I've upset people. It wasn't my intention. I think it's great that people are comfortable with their bodies and I wish I could turn back the clock and feel this way too.

@labialover I don't mean to offend. This site has (in some ways) helped. But in other ways made me worse. When people say how common this it it makes me feel better. But then so many guys come on here saying they can never find a girl like this and it's so rare etc... I know these men like it, but they are still pointing out the fact that it's unusal. I am paralysed with fear by the idea that a man may see it and be freaked out.

@kitty77 and @eva I didn't mean to say there was anything wrong with my lips. I never say anything bad about other women who tell me their 'imperfections' I just point out my own. As for the transference theory... it may be partly true but honestly I only started feeling this bad when i realised it was unsual.

Anyway, i have taken and sent several pics looking enormous. I would very much appreciate an HONEST answer as to how big they are.

LabiaLover

@ECC22

I'll be posting the pics you sent, and per your request only posting my opinion on them and closing the thread so that no one else can post an opinion about your lips.

Quite honestly thought. . .you say that so many guys come on here saying that they can never find a girl like this, and so forth -- have you considering for a moment the sexual activity of some of these men??

I mean I don't say this to offend any of the guys on this site (and feel free to chime in here fellas if what I say isn't true), but besides @mrmarquis and @tempest_driver who have probably experienced as many women as I have, if not more, I suspect the vast majority of on this site haven't had many women with which to compare labia in the first place, and those that have often desire the nicer, thicker, longer labia.

I've personally seen men on this site, and the sister site, actually cite the fact that they had been with women who had small labia, and then women with large labia, and missed the women they had with large labia -- so again I suspect your only hearing what you want to hear, or seeing what you want to see. . .

Personally you didn't offend me, and you definitely didn't upset me -- I rarely ever get upset. I think all of 2011 I might have gotten upset enough times to count on one hand. . .and I could probably be missing fingers.

My life is a magnificent trip to be honest -- so nothing really offends me or upsets me, although based on my vocabulary and the words/demeanor I use it could lead you to believe otherwise, but I assure you, even if it sounds like it, I'm almost never upset.

Disappointed, yes. . .but rarely ever upset.

Do you upset me? No. But you do disappoint me, because I expect more from you honestly. ;)

Cornball

WOOOOOOSAHHHHHH. Ok, everybody woosah, lets keep this community just that, a community. We should strive to support each other and if one of us mispeaks or needs a little more support than other we should collectively try to get her there. In her post ECC22 requested to know how to upload her photo to get the communities honest opinion, and I am sure that is something that Labialover will be able to explain to her. While it is easy to perceive her comments in a negative way, lets give her what she asks for and that is honest feedback. The purpose of my book is to squash exactly what her mindset is, and that is that large labia are different; she is correct in the fact that labeling large labia as special, rare, exotic is the same as saying different. But ECC22 you also have understand that those terms may just be referring to the individuals exposure to a particular "type." (imagine someone who has only ever been with girl with large labia, who then stumbles upon simple "closed" labia, to him those will be rare, special, and exotic). The goal of the book is to do away with all those terms and replace them with just one: Unique. Because no matter how you look down there, you ARE unique, I can guarantee that there is NO other labia, just like yours, nor is there another labia just like there girl sitting on either side of you on the train, because you are all unique. Unique is a term of ubiquity while rare, special, and exotic are terms of circumstance.

ECC22

Thank you Cornball. I have sent a couple more pics in. I don't care if people discuss them or not. To me doing the pictures was very hard as it upsets me alot (they seem to look bigger than ever in close up shots!!)

Some days I'll think 'Oh the're not that bad/not that different' and then I see those photos of everything hanging and feel a million times worse.

I obviously know there are no other girls exactly like me. But please understand until a year ago i thought all girls stuck out aftter puberty. To discover what I have is 'unusual' and undesirable (yes not by you but by society as Cornball has already pointe out) is extremely distressing for me.

Anyway, please put images up. We can have an HONEST discussion about how big I really am. (I want to know if I'm exaggerating or if I really am one of the biggest girls- eg top 10/5%. Please don't lie and tell me they're average if they're not.

My greatest fear is surprisng a guy. I'm being honest- i wouldn't want to get down with a guy and be surprised by his tiny penis. The same goes for a man. Even if he thinks "ooohheer that's not what i was expecting." I know the right guy will say he loves me anyway. But sex is SUCH an important part of a relationship i really don't want him to be secretly wishing i had smaller lips forever.... As I said, I wouldn't break up with a guy who was tiny (too shallow) but would it make me less attracted to him sexually? If I'm honest? Yes it would.

LabiaLover

@ECC22

I'm about to post your pics, and given your difference of opinion from yesterday, I will post your thread and now allow others to respond on it, but will force them refrain from giving you positive feedback, and instead only give you honest feedback about how big your lips are (somehow that doesn't seem to be a dialog conducive to making you feel any different than you already do, but.. ..I don't know what else to say at this point).

Stand by. . .

Eva

Hmm...looks like I have to go flower shopping then. I'll have to play with some poses to find out which one works with my lips best.

tempest_driver

@cornball, I want to apologize for the way this thread got hijacked.

SugarPlumFaery

@ECC22 - Hi sweetheart. I wanted to reply to you on this thread
sooner but I have a lot of things I want to address so I've only just
got around to typing it. I saw recently that you were leaving the site
for a bit in order to get away from having labia as your dominant
thought, so I applaud you for this but also hope you get to read this
before you go.

Firstly, this bit...

QUOTE:- "I've
gone away from this site for a few weeks, tried to feel better about
myself but NOTHING seems to work. They are sore and irritated all the
time from rubbing/ me trying to push them inside the other lips. I'm
aware of them when I walk, when I bend down and even when I sleep I
dream about them. I wash daily and thoroughly but they seem to smell
and get horrible white stuff in all the folds really quickly. (I don't
have any infections.) Everyone says hairless vaginas seem more hygeinic
and I think small labia would smell better/stay clean for longer."

Whatever
you do, don't listen to those idiots who promote douching or sticking
anything else up there, including yoghurt. The vagina is SELF-CLEANING;
nothing needs to go up there that wouldn't do in nature. Douching
causes more trouble than you had to begin with because it washes away
the 'good' bacteria that you need up there. Natural, live yoghurt may
have beneficial bacteria in it but it is an alkaline food and the vagina
is acidic; the alkalinity brings down the acid in the vagina and that's
when the 'bad' bacteria which cause problems multiply. Semen is also
alkaline and so it has the same effect, which is why it can cause so
many problems for those of us with sensitive kitties when condoms are
foregone and a man ejaculates inside us. There are plenty of other
things which can cause this kind of soreness and irritation - underwear
made of man-made fibres instead of wearing cotton or silk; the washing
powder used to wash said underwear; bubble-bath; water too hot; and
soap. In fact, soap is one of the worst. Any doctor worth their salt
will not promote using soap to wash the genital area (both for men and
women) as it irritates mucous membranes (and can cause UTIs) and is also
generally alkaline. I recommend that you forego underwear as I stopped
having any problems when I stopped wearing underwear about 11 years
ago; it means the air can circulate and you can let yourself breathe
down there and also avoids your kitty being in close contact with the
detergents that clothes are washed in. I recommend you get yourself a
muslin cloth, preferably of organic cotton, and simply wash with JUST
WATER. If you sit in a bath, then don't have the water too hot, and
don't add anything to the bath water. Go for a week or two and see how
you go on. In the meantime, buy yourself a body-wash that contains tea
tree oil. I use the Australian Body Care brand for now, but will be
looking at getting a paraben-free one. Tea tree oil is antibacterial,
antiseptic and antifungal, and has a distinct medicinal-type smell to
it. It kills odours and is also used for oily skin. It sounds like
your sebum and sweat glands are very productive. We don't have many
sebum glands in that area, but we do still have some. Tea tree has a
drying effect. I don't recommend its use daily, as it will dry you too
much down there and you will get 'chapped lips' if you're not careful
but I can't recommend it enough for making you feel clean and fresh.
It's way healthier for your lady garden than soap and other harmful
detergents. If you feel too dry after the tea tree, just use coconut
oil as a safe, natural moisturiser.

I also recommend Fem-Dophilus by Jarrow Formulas (available at iHerb - use code TOH009 for a $5.00
discount on your first iHerb order). I can't find anywhere in the UK
that doesn't sell this at astronomical prices, so you'll have no choice
but to send to the US for it. It is made up of the probiotic cultures
L-Rhamnosus and L-Reuteri, the only ones to pass through the intestinal
wall and set up home in the vagina and urethra. These are the 'good'
bacteria that naturally populate the vagina but you can tell when their
numbers are depleted when you get yeast infections, BV, bladder/UTIs, or
you've been on a course of antibiotics. Unfortunately, conventional
antibiotics kill the 'good' bacteria as well as the 'bad.' I highly recommend this product.

Regarding
'hairless vaginas,' bear in mind that we have pubic hair for a reason.
It absorbs moisture; it shows that we are sexually mature and fertile;
it holds our natural scent which is attractive to the other sex. If you
take your hair off with a razor then be ready to battle ingrowing hairs,
infection, itchiness as it grows back, and toilet tissue sticking to
the stubble! It's a high maintenance option, and you will need to use
natural baby-wipes (like those from NatraCare) often to clean off sweat
since you won't have pubic hair to absorb it anymore. My own preference
is to use a gentleman's shaver (those that are used on heads and
beards) as you can take the hair off above the skin so you won't get
ingrowing hairs (and the infections these cause) and you can use
different 'grades' for different areas and shaping. Laser hair removal,
intense pulsed light or electrolysis are the best options if you want
to be completely bald down there, they may be costly but at least
they're permanent and you won't have to think about it again once it's
done. I wouldn't recommend depilatory creams due to the chemicals they
contain but they're certainly a gentler alternative than shaving with a
razor, as long as you buy one for 'sensitive skin.' I don't recommend
waxing due to the pain and greater chance of ingrowing hairs from the
hair being plucked out. Plus, you will definitely get bruising in that
area after a wax because the skin is so delicate.

I found this on the internet that you might want to
bear in mind, so I'm just copy/pasting as I think it will interest you
and others:

~ "Persons that shave or trim their
pubic hair are unwittingly eliminating from their bodies an
extraordinarily powerful ingredient in the recipe for satisfying sexual
relations – pheromones, bodily secretions that are unconsciously sensed
by the human brain and deemed highly necessary for fulfilling sexual
relations by physicians specializing in human sexuality. A specialized
structure located inside the nose called the Vomeronasal organ detects
invisible airborne and odourless pheromone molecules that are produced
in specialized sweat glands (apocrine glands) which occur primarily in
the genital and axillary areas, and to a lesser degree in the naval and
anal areas of the body. Body hair in these areas trap and concentrate
the apocrine gland pheromone secretions, where naturally occurring
bacteria begin to decompose them. During this natural decomposition
process, pheromones are released into the air as sweat evaporates from
the skin and body hair. Once airborne, especially during sexual
relations, these pheromones are sensed by the Vomeronasal organ. These
signals are then sent through specialized nerves to a part of the brain
called the hypothalamus -- a part known for its capacity to alter
one's emotions, hormones, and sexual behavior. During sexual
relations, the effect of pheromones is extraordinarily powerful,
resulting in a high degree of stimulation and activity. Elimination or
reduction of body hair in the area of the apocrine glands results in a
corresponding reduction of pheromones. This in turn translates into
mildly to highly decreased sexual stimulation of one’s sexual partner.
The main pheromones produced by the apocrine glands are: In males:
Androstenone, Androstenol, and Androsterone. These pheromones strongly
increase the desire for sexual intercourse in women. In females:
Copulins, an assortment of fatty acids and other biological molecules
that serve to induce copulation in men. Interestingly, research has
demonstrated that homosexual males and females react as strongly to
pheromones released by members of their own sex, as heterosexual males
and females respond to pheromones released by members of the opposite
sex." ~

You said, ~QUOTE~: "That's why I came looking for
stats/information on how many women are 'messy looking' down there.
Whenever I'm with women, i always think I must have the ugliest,
biggest, saggiest fanny there. I have tiny outer labia (they haven't grown since I was a child and are
1cm deep) so I have this lump of rotting meat hanging out of me.
Urghh."

I am not in the least bit offended by your
words. This statement does, however, make me so sad, not only for you
that you feel this way about yourself, but for the plight of the
sisterhood in general. It unfortunately reflects the thoughts of most
women, because the misogynistic society we live in promotes this level
of self-hatred and wants women to think negatively about themselves.
The best thing I can recommend to help you emotionally is the book by
Louise L. Hay called 'You Can Heal Your Life.' She is one of the most
inspirational women you will ever encounter. I also recommend you buy
the Gift Edition because of the colourful illustrations it has
throughout. She also has subliminal affirmation CDs which I promise will
help you enormously. I've provided the links for you. For now you
might want to try one of the first exercises in the book, and that is to
look yourself directly in the mirror and say, 'I love you' to yourself
and notice how it makes you feel and what issues might come up. Some
people feel silly, some feel sad, some start to cry, and some just can't
say it. I promise you, if you keep telling yourself many times 'I love
you' everyday, you will start to feel and believe it. Another exercise
is to picture yourself as a little girl, aged 6 years old, frightened,
crying and looking for love. Let your-adult-self observe her. What
does your-adult-self want to do? Does she want to go up to this crying,
frightened little girl and put her arms around her, comfort her and
tell her everything is going to be all right? Or does she want to shout
at her and scold her for not being 'perfect,' and for having "ugly,
saggy" body parts? Which one does that little girl still inside you
deserve - love and approval, or criticism and hate? I'll also type you
out this affirmation which you can copy out and start saying everyday.
But don't just read the words, say it with conviction, and believe it!

"In
the infinity of life where I am, all is perfect, whole, and complete. I
no longer choose to believe in old limitations and lack. I now choose
to begin to see myself as the Universe sees me - perfect, whole, and
complete. The truth of my Being is that I was created perfect, whole,
and complete. I will always be perfect, whole, and complete. I now
choose to live my life from this understanding. I am in the right place
at the right time, doing the right thing. All is well in my world."

(http://www.amazon.co.uk/You-Can-Heal-Your-Life/dp/1561706280/ref=sr_1_2?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1331516091&sr=1-2,  http://www.amazon.co.uk/Stress-Free-Peaceful-Affirmations-Relieve-Anxiety/dp/140190405X/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1331516278&sr=8-1,  http://www.amazon.co.uk/Self-Esteem-Affirmations-Motivational-Confidence-Recognizing/dp/1561705322/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1331516361&sr=8-1)

You said, ~QUOTE~ "When people say how common this is it makes me feel
better. But then so many guys come on here saying they can never find a
girl like this and it's so rare etc... I know these men like it, but
they are still pointing out the fact that it's unusual."

LabiaLover
sums this one up just right with... ~QUOTE~ "-- have you considering for a
moment the sexual activity of some of these men?? I mean I don't say
this to offend any of the guys on this site (and feel free to chime in
here fellas if what I say isn't true), but besides @mrmarquis and
@tempest_driver who have probably experienced as many women as I have,
if not more, I suspect the vast majority of men on this site haven't
had many women with which to compare labia in the first place,"~ ...and
don't forget that you and I live in the UK, take a good look around,
there are so many God damn fugly men living here that it surprises me we
are reproducing! The men you mention probably can't even get ONE
woman, period, so especially don't listen to them when they're making
stupid jokes about labia size! I suspect that they're covering up their own fears/insecurities when they do this. Ignore them.

I apologise that I have written so much for you @ECC22 but I really wanted to help you because you sound in such a bad place emotionally. I hope very much that the site moderators will keep this comment on here for you, and for the other women the information contained herein will help, particularly with regard to hygiene - this is the reason I didn't send it as a private message. I do understand if it needs to be deleted from this particular thread (sorry @Cornball!!) but it took me ages to type (as you can probably imagine!) so can you paste it elsewhere on the site if needs be. Ta. :)

ECC22

Thank you. I have written you a private email.

Cornball

@tempest_driver no need to apologize, this is doing exactly what it needs to do. It is raising awareness as to exactly why I am making this book through real life example, so I do appreciate all the conversation and dialogue.

@SugarPlumFaery lol, somebody had their coffee this morning. I will not remove your post, because then it will be out of context and not mean anything to anybody who was not present and is attempting to catch up. No apologies needed, but you should consider submitting your own flower for the book :).

mrmarquis

Sugar Plum Faery,

Well said, my dear, well said. I do hope that all of your effort is helpful to ECC22. It is my hope, that with all the advice, the guidance, and the love expressed here, she can find her way to the full enjoyment and appreciation of her body, along with all the joy and pleasure it was designed to provide her.

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